Love for Sutton, James & Noah

Our story is one of love, loss and unwavering support from Love for Lily. 

Last July we were filled with joyful anticipation as we discovered we’d conceived triplets; we found out we were having 3 more boys. 4 boys under 4! Yikes.

We had weekly validation that the boys, “A”, “B”, and “C” were thriving. So we did what rational adults do: we planned. We told our 3 year old son, Campbell, about his little brothers. We researched daycares and strollers. We looked into cribs and new houses for those cribs. We test-drove a bus. We lovingly debated names. We nurtured hopes and dreams for our growing family. 

But, life can be cruel. Near the end of the pregnancy, we experienced the unimaginable loss of 2 of our precious babies. “A” and “C”. James and Noah. Our world shattered. Further, we learned Baby “B” was barely hanging on. We were told that he too would likely not make it; we prepared for the worst. 

Weeks later, we held our breath as an NST led to an urgent C-Section. We hoped desperately for Baby “B” to survive birth. 

Our sons were born at 28 weeks on Tuesday, January 3rd, 2023. 

Sutton, our Baby “B”, was born at 11:13 AM. 

James, our Baby “A”, was stillborn at 11:16 AM.

Noah, our Baby “C”, was stillborn at 11:17 AM.

The shock of finally seeing them brought us to tears with the gut wrenching reality of how delicate life is. We hoped for a miracle when we saw Sutton. Our hearts broke when we helplessly watched them take James and they broke again when they took Noah.

Sutton was a teeny tiny micro-preemie, weighing 560 grams. He was just 10 and ½ inches long. 

We held James and Noah on January 4th. On the 7th, we were able to hold Sutton for the first time. Then, we held James and Noah for the last time. It was one of the hardest days of our lives.

We helplessly watched as Sutton battled every single day to grow and thrive (though, admittedly we are still working on the “thrive” part). Despite our despair, we found hope when we started to see that he was a fighter.The NICU became our second home—a place of both heartache and miracles, of anguish and triumph.

Our NICU journey was a rollercoaster of uncertainty; for every step forward there were 2 steps back. Each milestone that Sutton hit, we were keenly aware that his brothers hadn’t. Our NICU path was paved in gratitude, but also shrouded in immense grief.

Sutton has spent more than 180 days in various hospitals so far.

When people ask us how we’ve made it through this, we tell them about the tribe that surrounds us with love and support.

We tell them about our NICU family; we talk about the nurses, respiratory therapists, occupational therapists, CNAs, neonatal nurse practitioners, neonatologists, and a nurse who changed our lives by giving us a paper with Sahra’s number on it.

Love for Lily is a remarkable organization that became our guiding light, extending their compassionate embrace when we needed it most. They are more than a non-profit. They are part of our family. 

Love for Lily not only supported us emotionally but also provided essential resources. They offered financial assistance for expenses, ensured that we felt comfortable advocating for the best possible care, and eased the burden of navigating the complex healthcare system. Every person we met through Love for Lily understood our good days and bad days with absolutely zero judgment; their unwavering commitment to our well-being gave us the strength to carry on.

Love for Lily became the bridge that connected us to other parents who had experienced loss, who had felt the depths of despair, and who understood the complexities of navigating life in the NICU. Through their programs and events, they created spaces where we could find healing and strength, where we could laugh through tears and build lasting friendships.

To everyone at Love for Lily, thank you for all you’ve done and continue to do for our family; you helped us find solace. We truly do not have the adequate words to express our gratitude - we think we’ll be searching for them forever.

Our journey has been marked by the heartache of both loss and love, but it has also been graced with the presence of incredible individuals who selflessly dedicate their lives to supporting families like ours. Thank you for letting us tell you about Sutton, James and Noah.

The mission of Love for Lily extends far beyond our own stories. It encompasses the lives of countless families who have faced unimaginable loss, who have experienced the challenges of the NICU, and who continue to rebuild their lives with hope. Let us honor their strength, celebrate their resilience, and pledge our unwavering support to Love for Lily and the incredible work they do.

Thank you, from the bottom of our hearts, for reading about our journey and for standing with families like ours. Together we can make a difference and bring healing and hope to those who need it most.

All of our love, 

Collin, Lexie, Campbell & Sutton